Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Nadine's Story...

WARNING - This is long, but please read it all!

I want to tell anyone who reads this page everything about my Nadine! My daughter is one of the funniest, most sassy lil girls I've ever met. She has a great sense of humor and loves to laugh and joke around with her Daddy and I. She's a drama queen, as most girls are, and keeps us on our feet.

I am not Nadine's biological mother. But I am her MOMMY. I have raised Nadine since me and Chris got back together (we were seperated for a couple years and she was born in that time) when she was not even 2 yet. At this point, Nadine does not know I am not the one who gave birth to her. We have never lied, but I guess there has never been a question come up yet that has forced us to answer this very grown up question for a 5 year old. I am the only one who has been there everyday taking care of her, loving her, making sure she is fed and put to bed on time. I walk her to the bus stop, I help her with her school work. I love her with all my heart and am the only Mommy she has.

Last week, out of the blue Chris was served with legal papers stating that "L" (biological mother) is trying to get joint custody of Nadine and be able to take her from our home here in Missouri all the way to California (where we moved from 4 years ago) to visit. It's not a new conversation for us, we have discussed letting L see Nadine, in fact we have. I will list all of that soon.

In order to make sure Nadine is not allowed to leave her home here in Missouri, we need a lawyer. Chris is currently applying for a 2nd job, and me being pregnant and high risk I am working part time from home. We are trying to do everything in our power to pull together the money for a lawyer to help us keep Nadine safe.


Reasons Nadine should not be allowed to leave with L
  • When Nadine was 6 months old Chris recieved a call that Nadine was left in a drug house days before and had no formula or diapers
  • In the last 4 years L has seen Nadine a total of maybe 8 times, one visit here that lasted a month or so as well
  • Nadine's older sister was molested by a family member of L's and they did nothing about this. I know this from L telling me herself.
  • Child Protective Services has been called on L more times than I can remember for the older sister. L even tried having this 8 year old lil girl put in juvenile hall.
  • L is a meth addict and a thief.
  • While staying in Missouri to "see her daughter" L and her boyfriend stole wallets from a career center here. He took the blame, and she did no jail time.
  • L is not a responsible mother, she should not have any children with the lifestyle she has.
  • L has recieved welfare for Nadine in the state of California even though she has not lived in the same house as her since Nadine was 6 months old. We have reported it, but has the system helped us? NO! Chris recieves bills for her overpayment on Nadine even though we have reported it.
  • Nadine know's L, but she does not know her in the way that she wants to leave with her to another state while she is still so young. We have talked to her, and told her L might visit her. She is very worried about leaving with her, she just wants her Mommy and Daddy.
  • L's own family and friends have told us if she gets Nadine to CA, she will NOT bring her back to us.

I realize that Nadine needs to form some sort of relationship with L. Chris and I have known this, and tried in different ways to help that happen (including letting her come here to see her as I stated above). But in the end L has never done anything for Nadine. She doesn't call on a regular basis and in the time Nadine has been with me she has never recieved a Christmas gift or birthday present. To a child who is promised this on the phone and doesn't get it...well it's heartbreaking to see her disapointed.

Nadine has also been through so much this last year. She was there when her baby sister was born and died due to prematurity. We all deal with this on a daily basis, and she can't take much more pain and change right now.

I am asking everyone to please help in any way you can. My family has helped us through so much in the last year having to bury our baby daughter. And now we are asking everyone for help. It doesn't matter the donation, big or small, it just matters that we get a lawyer who will stand up for Nadine and her rights. Not the rights of a "mother" who has never given a full interest in her.

What we hope to gain with a lawyer

  • Establish a custody order that is appropriate given the circumstances
  • Set up visitations here in Missouri, where Nadine is supervised
  • Make sure there is no way for L to take Nadine out of the state, and if she does it will be kidnapping

There is a court date in CA on Oct. 9th, if we do not have a lawyer to appear for us, L will be granted whatever she wants. She will be given a court order that she can come to our door and take Nadine from us. There is nothing more that I want to do than protect Nadine from any physical or emotional harm. I am not trying to keep L out of her life, I am trying to protect her.

PLEASE HELP US KEEP NADINE SAFE!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I was wondering if you have talked to a lawyer about your situation. They may be willing to do your case pro bono (for free) considering the situation. Also, I think the court can also appoint a lawyer for you since you can't afford one.